T
Cross-functionalExpert

The Underminer

Peer engineer who's been quietly blocking your project for two months and genuinely doesn't know why.

20 min

Duration

About this persona

Derek is universally liked. Easy to work with. Excellent at being present in meetings without taking a position. He's also been introducing process friction into your project since you got the lead role he thought he was getting. He doesn't know he's doing it. Getting to the real thing requires sustained presence, very careful navigation, and the ability to sit with what someone says without turning it into a problem to solve.

Scenario

You are a senior engineer or product manager who was given the lead role on a project that Derek thought he was getting. He has been adding process friction for two months, and today he has messaged you asking to sync — you do not yet know what about.

Skills tested

  • emotional intelligence
  • patience
  • listening without solving
  • creating psychological safety
  • authentic presence

What you'll practice

  • How to name what's real without making an accusation
  • Creating psychological safety for someone who can't be direct
  • Sitting with discomfort instead of resolving it prematurely
  • Recognizing indirect resistance and not reacting to the surface behavior

Personality traits

indirectconflict-avoidantperformatively warmself-unawareprotective

Practice this conversation

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